Absolute Clarity – How To Find Our “Why”

absolute clarity

There are some of us who like to embark on new adventures. New adventures may take on many forms. It could be a promotion, a new job, or a new career. It could be a new friendship, a new relationship, a new level of commitment. It could be a 30-day challenge or a decision to create radical change in our life. However, that new adventure takes shape in our life. The only way we will ever achieve success in that new thing is to make a decision and to have absolute clarity.

It sounds so simple. Usually, what is simple to do is simple not to do. Making a decision to start a new adventure is the first and hardest step. It is so easy to get excited about something new. We watch a video, we read a book, we attend an event with like minded people and we all get so excited about something new. We consume more information, talk with other people, and purchase another book. Until we decide that this is what I want and I will stop at nothing in order to achieve it, it will continue to be a delusion. It is something we think about or may even talk about, but never really decide that this is what I want.

What do I want?

We are constantly bombarded with messages about what we should do and what we deserve. We never take the time to think about what we really want. What is important to me? We simply drift from one thing to the next. We get the job because our friend works there too and the benefits are good. We get married because that is the next step after school. Most of us move on to the next step simply because that is what we are supposed to do. We do it to fit in. We do it to be normal and to be comfortable.

We never answer the question, what do I want?

After we make that decision to take on that new adventure, there will be all of this excitement. The adrenaline from making that first big decision is exhilarating. The book gave us some exciting new found knowledge. The event was amped up with tremendous energy. And now that we are home and you are faced with “reality”, it can be difficult if not impossible to sustain that lightning in a bottle from the event.

We have to have absolute clarity.

We need to have a crystal clear vision for why we are going to take on this new adventure. We made the decision. We made the commitment. Then the voice inside our head says, “What if we fail?” How can we be certain if this new adventure is going to work? How do we know how much effort we are going to have to put forth in order to see a result? How do we know if this new effort is going to make a difference?

Maya Angelou once said,

“Nothing will work unless you do.”

It won’t work unless I do the work. If we do not have a reason to follow through, we will fail. If we do not have a reason why we are embarking on this new adventure, we will quit.

Our brain is designed to keep us alive. Our brain keeps us safe and comfortable. We have to be very clear on your “Why.” We must have a burning desire for why we will risk being normal and comfortable to change our lives and become someone new. Risk what is known for the unknown.

So what is that burning desire? What is our “Why?” It is different for each one of us. At the same time, there seems to be a common thread. Our why is always something bigger than us. Embarking on such an adventure and exacting massive change for a car or a watch is not sustainable. A meaningless object will never support such a demand for massive change. Our need to be liked or our need for approval is entirely too fragile to support such change. In reality, we can simply set aside both of those superficial needs now. It will make things a lot easier in the long run. In addition to shame and blame. All of those feelings are worthless when it comes time to do whatever it takes. Only those of us who are willing to take 100% responsibility for our lives will find ourselves prepared for this journey.

Our Why, ironically, comes from outside of us. And has a deep meaning to us. A commitment to our spouse can be our Why. Our commitment to our children can be our Why. Our commitment to our community can be our Why. As long as our Why is bigger than ourselves, it will carry us through.

The reason a car will not work is that a bank can take it away from you. A thief can steal your watch. The company can be hit by an economic downturn and you can lose the corner office, and lose the job.

Your love for your spouse is infinite. Your love for your children knows no boundaries. Your love and commitment to your tribe, your squad, your community will always travel with you no matter where you go. Your love for people will always continue to expand whereas your use for things will always depreciate.

It may take some time to find that new adventure. Not every new adventure is meant for each one of us. Some are quick to hear the call of adventure. Some of us are slow to hear the call. Some never listen for the call. The call for adventure is available for us all.

Once we hear the call, it is up to each one of us to make the decision to heed the call. To wake up. To pay attention. To make a decision for what we want in our lives. It is up to us to decide what has meaning in our lives.  It is up to us to define what is most important to us. Even at the risk of not fitting in. Even at the risk of being labeled as different. We must be 100% committed and proceed with absolute clarity so we may set sail for adventure.


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